God’s Design for the Family: A Call to Active Duty

The soldier is summoned to a life of active duty, and so is the Christian. The nature of the calling precludes a life of ease. If you had thought to be a summer soldier, consider your commission carefully.1

In the UK (and all around the Western world) the battle over the family is raging and the grounds of the battle are always moving. But why does it forever appear that Christians are in retreat? The 1967 Abortion Act made abortion legal up to 28 weeks of gestation (this was amended to 24 weeks in 1990, although abortion is permissible up until birth in the case of a fetal abnormality). The year 2013 saw the legalization of civil marriage for same-sex unions in England and Wales (2014 in Scotland and 2019 in Northern Ireland). “No fault divorce” was legalized in April 2022, and December 2022 saw the Scottish Parliament voting to allow 16-year-olds to change their gender. The attack continues to rage over euthanasia. Although we might think there is not much of God’s design for the family left to surrender to the ungodly, the seemingly untouchable taboo of child abuse is being softened as pedophiles are increasingly referred to as “minor-attracted people.”2 Meanwhile, the Church of England is proposing to bless same-sex unions as well as looking into using gender neutral terms to refer to God in prayers.3

The risk is that the soldier of Christ will become callous toward Satan’s attacks on the family (Ephesians 6:12).

The risk is that the soldier of Christ will become callous toward Satan’s attacks on the family (Ephesians 6:12). Divorce no longer raises eyebrows (of course, there is often an innocent party), same-sex “marriage” is only seen as slightly wrong—it is considered far more serious to speak out against it. Young people confused about which pronoun to use do not provoke the horror they might have 30 years ago. Perhaps there is some tension between the world and Christians over the current battleground, but we have long given up on ground already taken.

Where is our courage? Where is our determination? Where is our dedication to duty? Why do we appear to be losing ground all the time? Could it be that we have become “fair-weather” soldiers who make an appearance when life is easy and sound the retreat when the going gets tough? Soldiers of Christ must be fully equipped with the armor of God and have no hesitation about going on the offensive (Ephesians 6:11). This means repentance for sinful silence, dedicated study to better understand God’s Word and apply it to the secular tide, and the confidence to speak God’s Word in season and out (2 Timothy 4:2).

Think about three places where it is all too easy to cower to worldly opinions rather than to assert God’s design for the family.

1. In Our Churches

The pastor-soldier in active duty should be unafraid to preach God’s Word clearly, fully, faithfully, and lovingly, even if it means that the wolves are exposed and removed (or some weaker believers take offence and leave) (2 Timothy 4:1–2).

How many pastors have avoided preaching that marriage is between a man and a woman (Matthew 19:4–6) for the past 10 years and are suddenly surprised to note that the pews are filled by those who have no problem with same-sex “marriage”? How many pastors are afraid to ask the obvious questions when people who have no business marrying one another seek their church’s blessing? How many pastors have never publicly prayed that God would stay the slaughter of the unborn? How many church members are unequipped to deal with conversations about gender in the workplace because their pastor is afraid to teach from Genesis that “male and female [God] created them” (Genesis 1:27)? How many young people leave for university, having attended church all their lives, but are ill-equipped to take on feminist dogma or LGBTQ ideology because their church leaders thought the greater good would be in refusing to ruffle any feathers rather than ensuring their younger members were fully prepared and ready for active duty?

2. In Our Families

We do not need to take our cues from the pace at which the government teaches our children immorality.

The parent-soldiers in active duty do not wait until a child mentions something about a book read at school called Heather Has Two Mummies to talk to their children about marriage (this is assuming the child will even think to tell their parents what they have been taught in school). We do not need to take our cues from the pace at which the government teaches our children immorality. The parent-soldier is on the offensive in teaching children God’s design for the family (Ephesians 6:4). A solid grounding, well-rooted in Scripture, in the sanctity of marriage, the preciousness of life, and the fixity of gender readies our little ones to immediately recognize Satan’s counterfeit.

Parent-soldiers recognize that their children are being raised in a world that dubs evil good and good evil (Isaiah 5:20). Nevertheless, they raise their children from a position of peace rather than panic. While salvation belongs to the Lord (Jonah 2:9), they know that God has designated means for raising little ones in the Lord (2 Timothy 3:15). Children are taught God’s law and the gospel (Galatians 3:24). They attend the church where their parents worship and are encouraged in good friendships while being warned away from those that are unhealthy.

3. In Our Societies

The citizen-soldier in active duty does not wait until he has been backed into a corner to admit his own beliefs about the family. Friends and colleagues all know what this person stands for. They know they cannot bully this person into accepting the prevailing secular orthodoxy. The citizen soldier is unafraid to use Scripture in conversations with friends, neighbors, and family. He refuses to lay down his Sword (the Word of God, Ephesians 6:17), and those around him know his position. Mud may be thrown, but none of it will stick since the citizen-solder is as wise as a serpent and as innocent as a dove (Matthew 10:16). The citizen-solder still calls out sin that long ago became acceptable (Matthew 14:3–4; Acts 24:24–25). He vehemently defends territory that Satan assaults, but he is also found on his knees crying out to a holy God that society will once again enact laws that reflect God’s purity, truth, and justice (Jonah 3; Daniel 4:25, 34, 37; Acts 26:27–29).

When it comes to active duty, we have a heavenly example: the one Man who did not shy from shedding his own blood for his people (cf. Mark 10:45). When Judas came to him in the garden, Christ did not cower behind a tree but instead said, “Friend, do what you came to do” (Matthew 26:50). Christians who live lives of active duty, contending for God’s design for the family, can expect knocks, bruises, and war-wounds. But these scars do not tell the whole story since the battle for the family is the Lord’s.

Be strong in the Lord, on whose performance lies the stress of battle, and not on your skill or strength.4