Thanksgiving with a Heavy Heart?

As we get older, we naturally lose family members to the “last enemy.” Our Thanksgiving dinner celebrations now are much different than those of 20–30 years ago. Rather than celebrating with our parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, we now celebrate with our children and/or grandchildren. Some close friends have also died, some have moved away, or some we have lost contact with, so being invited to two Thanksgiving dinners (which used to occur frequently) is a thing of the past for those of us in the 50–60 (or older) age range.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I love celebrations with my family, and my three-year-old granddaughter always lights up a room and causes me and other family members to smile. But when the older family members start to reminisce about past Thanksgivings, it is always with a heavy heart for parents, spouses, aunts, uncles, and cousins who have died. For those family and friends who were believers, there is great consolation in knowing that they are at home with the Lord (2 Corinthians 5:6–9)—one of the reasons that we have such great hope (1 Thessalonians 4:12–14) that we too will one day be raised in glory. However, we have no such comfort when we think of unsaved family and friends who have passed away. But whether saved or unsaved, we all feel (or will feel—if too young to have yet suffered this) the keen sense of loss caused by death.

Melancholy Musings?

So why am I writing what may, at first blush, seem such a melancholy Thanksgiving article? Is it to purposefully neglect the biblical calls to give thanks to God by hiding under some form of depression? Not at all! In fact, God’s Word even exhorts us to think (but not dwell) on the mortality of the human condition (Ecclesiastes 7:2–4), for in the end it will cause us to thank God even more for his patience, love, and kindness toward us. Scripture also tells us that dwelling on the “good old days” is an exercise in foolishness (Ecclesiastes 7:10), as we tend to suppress memory of the hard times during those years and overemphasize the good times. But it is God’s mercy and patience that Paul thanked God for daily (Colossians 1:10–12; 1 Timothy 1:16), and we should too. Peter reminded his readers that God’s patience was for their salvation (2 Peter 3:9, 3:15).

Peter reminded his readers that God’s patience was for their salvation.

So this Thanksgiving devotional article was written to encourage those who have suffered the loss of loved ones, either recently or long ago. While death is described as having a sting, we know that in the end, due to Christ’s redemptive work, that sting is not a permanent condition; we will be victorious in the end (1 Corinthians 15:55–57). Therefore, even when considering the loss of loved ones, we always have something to be thankful to God for (Ephesians 5:20; 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18). Scripture also tells Christians to be thankful that we have been qualified to share in the eternal inheritance with all other saints, have already been delivered from the kingdom of darkness, and will one day be transferred to the kingdom of his Son (Colossians 1:11–13).

The Bible also informs us that thanksgiving toward God and the Lamb will be a daily occurrence for believers in heaven (Revelation 7:9–12), where death will not be remembered (Revelation 21:3–4) and we will rejoice with all the saints (Revelation 19:7–8). And for those of us tinged with sadness over a believing relative’s death, during this Thanksgiving season, we have this encouraging statement from God—“Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints” (Psalm 116:15), and we believers do not mourn family member loss as ones who have no hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13–14). All of this is predicated on the resurrection of Christ, which we are enjoined to constantly bring to mind, especially as it pertains to the believer’s future hope:

Since we have the same spirit of faith according to what has been written, “I believed, and so I spoke,” we also believe, and so we also speak, knowing that he who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with Jesus and bring us with you into his presence. For it is all for your sake, so that as grace extends to more and more people it may increase thanksgiving, to the glory of God. So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:13–18)

This Thanksgiving, please remember to think on Christ’s death, burial, resurrection, and ascension, and give him thanks for conquering and removing the sting of death. And as you think on believing family member’s deaths, you can also thank God that they are now in his presence and are free from pain and sorrow. Now that is something to be truly thankful for!