Post-Grandkids Visit Checklist

Nannan’s Post-Grandkids Visit Checklist

This is a partial list and will be added to over time to help Poppa and Nannan cope with life:

1. Check outside lighting switch at back sliding door—turn back on.
2. Check which cords were pulled out of printer—plug back in.
3. Watch for carefully hidden items on stairs, placed strategically to cause major damage to body in a fall.
4. Check inside car, turn off inside lights, and reset all switches back to normal.
5. Check exercise/game room and pick up all darts so unsuspecting adult won’t injure feet.
6. Turn off light in downstairs bathroom and pick up toilet paper.
7. Check all toilets and flush smelly contents.
8. Watch for half-filled applesauce pouches that can project sauce if stepped on.
9. Watch for trails of Goldfish crackers and other cookies—sometimes they lead to hidden items.
10. Check armchairs for all sharp items strategically placed to harm adult who sit on them.
11. Ensure all battery-operated toys are off so they don’t make weird sounds during the night and disturb sleep.
12. Reconstruct gas fireplace—have glue handy to re-glue bricks.
13. Write note to buy more bulk packets of super glue.
14. Check pantry shelving for weird items.
15. Glue prize flowers back on plants.
16. Check bed for strategically placed small items meant to harm adult who tries to sleep.
17. Check under car for scooters placed to damage car and cause maximum stress.
18. Reprogram remotes on TV back to normal settings.
19. Look for billiard balls in hidden locations.
20. Check for missing cue sticks from billiard table—assume hidden under chairs and other places so Poppa can’t find them.
21. Watch for sharp objects on floor, deliberately placed to inflict pain.
22. Seal up trash bag containing used diapers.
23. Look in trash cans and search for valuable items (use gloves).
24. Use potent chemicals to remove drawings off furniture and walls.
25. Have touch-up paint handy for walls.
26. Set aside time for drywall repair.
27. Peel dried food off all cushions.
28. Search all drawers in furniture for hidden items (particularly food items).
29. Make monthly appointment at chiropractor.
30. Make monthly appointment for psychiatrist.
31. Buy monthly medical supplies—particularly Band-Aids with pretty pictures used to console children even if no injury.
32. Look for hidden food taken off plates to make Nannan think it was eaten.
33. Collect all toys in backyard and put away.
34. Check roof of house for toys.
35. Find which Christmas presents have been unwrapped.

Thanks for stopping by and thanks for praying,
Ken